("The Best Thing" by Kram)
- You don't have to agree with this.
It's your call.
The white sand, blue sky, and big surf.
Where else would you wanna be?
("The Best Thing" by Kram)
Yup, after one whole year at Angelus, it was still official.
This tiny little town in the middle of nowhere
had the best waves you could find,
anywhere.
Unfortunately, same couldn't be said about the school.
And after this weekend, Lockie Leonard was due to head back
to the dangerous, untamed wilderness of Angelus High,
for day one of the new school year.
If last year was anything to go by,
there will be predators to avoid, like feral bogans,
always at the ready to flush your head down the toilet.
And worse, teachers, whose life ambition
is to make your life even more miserable than their own.
And so now, for the weird thing.
For the first time in my life,
I was actually looking forward to going back to school.
I know what you're thinking.
Has Lockie finally lost his mind?
Well, yes and no.
Let me walk you through the details.
Okay, deep breath.
Vicki Streeton.
The girl who makes me forget basic words,
and makes my toenails ache.
The girl, who after a year of seemingly endless disasters,
has somehow miraculously become my girlfriend.
The last time I spoke to Vicki was moments before she left
on some family holiday to the States, for the whole summer.
There had never been a better time
to tell her exactly how I felt.
Something memorable she could take with her
for the six weeks.
- Don't forget to get me a t-shirt.
- What I really meant to say was,
I'm going to miss you so much.
But I didn't.
That's why I'm hanging out for school to start.
So I can see Vicki and tell her
all the things I meant to say.
However, Mom wasn't as keen
for the new school year to begin.
- Poo.
- What's that, Joy?
- Hate it.
Hate it, hate it, hate it.
The end of summer, the beginning of a new school year.
All the.
- All good things must come to an end.
- School lunches to make, school uniforms to iron
and all that homework night after night after night.
- Joy, nobody does Lockie's homework better than you.
- But I really let myself down last year.
You saw his school report.
- Sarge could see Mom's spirits needed a lift.
Which meant, it was time for a Leonard family
inspirational address.
- Team, I feel something.
There is definitely something in the air, all right.
Why else this feeling of excitement,
this gnawing in my belly,
this sense that opportunity is knocking at the door.
Hang on.
Could it be that just around the corner,
is the thrill of the future.
All of our astounding achievements as yet undreamt,
will be ours this year, our second year in Angelus,
when things can only be but new, and improved.
Of course there will be challenges faced for some.
But remember,
we are Leonards.
And so I give you the Leonard family toast.
- But we've already put away the cups.
- To adventure.
- For Phillip,
the adventures were just beginning.
He was about to start high school, a year early.
- Soon I'll be saying goodbye to childhood things
and hello to secondary education.
Can you just imagine it, Cyril?
The Science block, the lab coats,
and Phillip Leonard, sitting down with the finest minds
of our generation.
Can you imagine?
- I didn't want to rain on Phillip's parade
but pretty soon, I'd have to break the news
it was Angelus High he was going to, not NASA.
Here it was, it had finally arrived.
Proof I had nothing to worry about.
Hard evidence all was well between Vicki and me.
A postcard.
- Hi Lockie, Here is a view of the Grand Canyon.
We were here today.
It's very spectacular.
Bye, now.
Love, Vicki.
- So it was a bit brief.
But I'm sure Vicki would have said more if there was room.
I mean it's hard to fit "I miss you" and
"I've been thinking about you all summer"
on a tiny little postcard, right?
- What?
- In the meantime,
I must have read that postcard a thousand times,
trying to figure out what Vicki meant to say but didn't.
- Hi Lockie.
Hi Lockie.
Bye now. Bye now.
Love, Vicki.
Bye, now. Love, Vicki.
- Or maybe her dad was checking on her mail
before she posted it.
And she had been forced to send me a message in code.
- You need to wear spectacles.
Hide all your green crayons.
Hey hot boy. Can't wait.
- Let's do the math.
How long as Vicki been away?
Six weeks.
And how many postcards have you got?
One.
Have you ever thought that that's Vicki's way
of letting you know,
you're dropped?
- No, never thought that. Ever.
- Thought so.
- At least I knew I could rely
on my supportive parents for reassurance.
- No, I wouldn't think that's the case.
Not for a minute.
I mean, put yourself in Vicki's shoes.
She's out and about all day, sightseeing.
First you've got to find a postcard, and a pen, and a stamp.
I mean, how often do you find yourself looking for a pen?
I can't count the number of times I've found myself
looking for a pen.
- If Vicki were heartless enough to put you through
the gut-wrenching agonies of separation, the minx.
Well then, know that your family is here for you
with all the support and unconditional love
that you will need to survive such a crippling,
devastating...
Not that she's going to do that.
- Why, yes. Looking good.
- Lockie was a lot bigger than you, Phillip
when he started high school.
But there's plenty of room to grow.
Sarge?
- Plenty of room to grow.
- You're not sending him to school like that, are you?
He'll get.
- What's not to like?
- You don't think it makes you look a little...
- Distinguished? Commanding.
- Commanding. Yes, yes exactly.
- I'll bet Angelus High hasn't seen
anything like this before.
- And for good reason.
School was starting tomorrow,
and Phillip would be crushed like a bug.
And the even more devastating thought hit me.
I still hadn't heard from Vicki.
I couldn't take the uncertainty any longer.
I had to know where I stood with Vicki.
- What do you know Cyril.
We seem to have ended up at Vicki's house.
Maybe we should just pop in and check if she's home?
- Maybe this was a good sign.
Maybe Cyril's luck with the ladies would rub off on me too.
But the truth was, with Vicki and me,
I had no idea what reception I was going to get.
- Lockie! I missed you!
- Like this?
Or like this?
- It's you.
Yeah.
I'll see you later.
Or like this?
- Hey! Yeah, the States were great.
Great, I mean, what can I say?
I wish I could go back tomorrow.
Yeah, 'cause I just met so many really, really great people.
Like really, really interesting kinda,
hot guys.
- Anybody home?
- After ringing the front doorbell 11 times,
I finally gave up.
Sadly this could only mean one thing.
Before their holiday, Vicki's parents had been all fired up
about packing her off to an exclusive boarding school
in the city.
- For over 50 years,
graduates of the Dame Hilda Micklethwaite Ladies College
have stood astride the world's stages,
leaders of industry, the sciences, commerce,
and once or twice, even the arts.
- Yes, but where's the bit again about dating opportunities
with the sons of unscrupulous mining giants
or fabulously wealthy stock brokers?
- Uhm...
- Suddenly I wasn't looking forward
to heading back to school anymore.
- I know how you feel.
- Like all the other kids in town,
my best friend, Egg, was packing away summer memories
and looking to fit into a new pair of shoes.
- Dad, I don't know how you--
- What do you say Eggs now?
Lots of support?
- Thing was,
Egg's mom had won some ginormous art prize
and relocated to Scandinavia indefinitely.
Which meant she wouldn't be around
to witness the start of the school year
or anything much at all, for a while.
- Okay, Geoffrey.
New shoes, tick.
Lunch, tick.
And look, you're going to have some fun with these.
Sandwiches, with hundreds and thousands, aye?
- Great, dad. Excellent.
- Now then. Stationery.
- Hey, listen Dad.
Maybe I should choose my own stuff.
I know how busy you get.
- Hey, Geoffrey.
You and me, father and son.
We're solid.
If we don't have time for each other,
we're not much of a team, are we?
- Yeah, I know that.
But you don't need to feel you have to do
everything Mom did for me.
- I don't.
- Of course you don't.
Mom never knew when I had to go back to school.
I always had to tell her.
- I never know you did.
But in its own special way, Mom's complete lack of interest,
it was one of our family traditions.
But Geoff, from now on, you and me,
we're going to be creating a whole new bunch of traditions,
all of our own.
- I blame myself, Sarge.
I wish I'd never had agreed to have Phillip accelerated.
- He read every book in the library, twice.
- Well then they could jolly well buy more books then.
- Well, he'd read them too.
- Lockie had a hard enough time
fitting into high school last year.
And yet I have willingly set Phillip up
for this same painful fate.
Why do I insist on repeating this family's misery
time and time again.
- One vital variable you are forgetting, Joy,
is Phillip has an older brother looking out for him.
- Lockie?
You really think Lockie can make a difference?
- What self-respecting delinquent
would pick on Phillip Leonard
knowing his big brother had his back?
- Hold on, I didn't ask for this.
It's gonna be hard enough watching my own back as it is.
- Should I take in my Mars Rover tomorrow?
I'd like to show the head of the science faculty,
get his opinion.
- Maybe you should just leave it for a day or two.
You don't wanna fire all your big guns on the first day.
- Good thinking.
I shouldn't intimidate support staff
who needs to be working together all year.
Something simpler, perhaps?
What about my transportable ant farm?
- I don't think so.
The school has a strict no pets policy.
So, wouldn't wanna take the risk.
- Thanks for the heads up.
But I'm pretty confident I can argue a clear distinction
between pets and research subjects.
The ant farm it is.
- Poor Phillip.
He had no idea what was really up ahead of him.
Unlike everyone else in town
who were tucking themselves into bed,
dreading the start of the new school year.
Well, almost everybody.
- 11 hours 'til showtime.
- Yes!
Lockie, today's the day.
You're finally coming home.
- I'm thinking
if I couldn't improve my own prospects for the new year,
I could at least try to improve Phillip's.
- Morning, all.
- Phillip, what happened to your shirt?
- Okay, I may have been a bit scissor-happy.
- I must've had a growth spurt in my sleep.
It was like my body knew
it was time to step up to the plate.
- Couldn't let him go to school looking the way he did.
- And this is better?
- No.
Phillip, you'll stay home today with me and Blob.
All day, maybe longer.
- Don't worry, Mom, I've got it covered.
- Mom was right.
If Phillip had looked ridiculous before,
now he's inviting every feral bogan in the schoolyard
to take a swipe at him.
("The Best Thing" by Kram)
- Now you're sure you don't want me
to walk to school with you?
- Sure, Dad.
- All right, go straight there, Geoff.
And be careful on the roads.
Geoff!
Be sure to finish your lunch, every bit of it.
- Bye, Dad.
("The Best Thing" by Kram)
- Remember what I said?
Stick close to me at all times.
Okay.
Let's go.
- Wait, Lock.
I want to save the moment.
- Can't let him go inside looking like that.
Not on his first day.
He'll end up with his head shoved down a toilet like yours.
- I know.
- And it's not like you're going to be able
to fight all his battles for him.
It's a jungle out there.
Every man for himself.
- Hey.
- Okay, Lock.
Cue, music.
I'm ready.
("The Best Thing" by Kram)
- For a moment I thought we got away with it.
But then when the attack came, it came out of nowhere.
A pack of feral bogans swooping out of the sun.
- Wait, what up, hang on.
We did this all last year.
- Action replay, action replay, action replay
- Let that boy down.
- Vicki! And what's more,
she was wearing an Angelus High uniform.
- I said, put the boy down.
- Yes, I see, some high school fun, is it?
Very good.
It's always good to let off steam.
- Lockie, your mouth.
It's gaping.
It looks really unattractive.
- Hi Lockie. Happy new year.
- So good to see you.
- Same.
- 'Cause like, it's been...
- Breathe slowly, you're going red.
- Sorry it's just, I've been thinking about you all summer.
- Really?
- Have you been thinking about you all summer?
I mean, thinking about...
- I've been thinking about you too.
- I thought you might have forgotten about me altogether.
- Really?
- Yeah, and everything I said last time we were together.
- Got you a t-shirt.
- But I mean, all the other stuff I said,
and meant to say, but didn't.
- I remember what you said,
and meant, Lockie.
- It's just that I didn't actually hear from you though,
the whole time you were in the States.
- You didn't get my postcards?
- Yeah.
The postcard, it was awesome.
Really great. Loved it, Grand Canyon.
- What about all the rest?
- There were more?
- Yeah.
- What have we here?
I know somebody who's going to be
a very happy little boy.
- Couldn't believe how much I missed having you around.
- Same.
- Yeah, same. - Same.
- Vicki and me, we're made for each other.
We're a perfect fit.
And so are Phillip and high school, it turns out.
Like Sarge had said,
the future was waiting just around the corner for all of us.
- First impressions,
facilities, yeah it's reasonable.
Support staff, yes, so-so.
But there's a lot more work ahead of me
if I'm going to turn Angelus High
into a world class centre of innovation.
What about you, Lockie?
What do you think this coming year will bring?
- The coming year?
I don't know Phillip, no idea.
All I'll say is that it's gonna be new, and very improved.
("Worlds Away" by Jebediah)